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Transitions & Decisions in Life Services

First or subsequent generations of immigrants and migrants, life milestones, school and career choices and paths, growing and independence, relationships, marriage, children, aging, illness, caregiving, and death are moments that can feel like there is a “right” and a “wrong” way to go about it. We end up having sleepless nights, headaches, irritability, and anxiety about these events. We may avoid thinking about it or procrastinate on what needs our attention urgently.

Having a space and a therapist to identify your options, ways to manage with the stressors, and pacing your growth can be beneficial to stabilize your wellbeing to feel comfortable enough with these major changes in your life. Our team is skilled at balancing the need to follow your lead while also narrowing your focus, so you do not get overwhelmed about the situation.

Clients feel aligned with their decisions, and comfortable with the new changes in their lives after grounding themselves in therapy with a therapist who can be the anchor in their new phases in life. They can be “comfortably uncomfortable” as they discover that there is no absolute right or wrong way in these transitional points.


Workplace Stressors

Some people look forward to their work, whereas for others it can feel like a struggle on some days.

This article lists some reasons why you may not want to work and shares some tips that can help you cope when you really don’t feel like working.

Reasons Why You May Not Want to Work

These are some reasons why you may feel like you don’t want to work today:

    • You’re tired: If you’re tired or haven’t slept well, it can be extremely difficult to summon the motivation to do anything, let alone work.1 In addition to low motivation levels, lack of sleep can also affect your ability to pay attention, recall things, and make decisions, which are all skills you need at work.2
    • You have work fatigue: Apart from being generally tired, you may also be experiencing work fatigue. One study that examined the emotional exhaustion levels of employees across six corporations found that 60% of those assessed cited moderate to high burnout.3
    • You’re stressed out: According to the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health, 40% of workers find their work extremely stressful.4 While moderate amounts of short-term stress can boost your energy levels and help you be more productive, chronic stress can affect your physical and mental health.5
    • You don’t enjoy your job: If you don’t enjoy what you do, it can be really difficult to get yourself out of bed to get to work. This can happen if you’re not doing the job you want, you don’t find meaning in the work you’re doing, your dream job hasn’t lived up to what you thought it would be, or you’re stagnating in your role without any growth.
  • You’re facing issues in the workplace: If your manager has unrealistic expectations, you’re having a disagreement with one of your colleagues, or your working style differs from that of your team members, it can lead to conflict at work that you may be reluctant to face.
  • You don’t like the work culture: A disorganized, unsupportive, stressful, or discriminatory work culture can be difficult to deal with. Poor work culture can interfere with your ability to work with your team and affect your job satisfaction levels.6
  • You’re feeling bored: Everyone feels bored or lazy from time to time. Feeling that way once in a while is all right, but feeling that way regularly could mean you’re not in the right job for yourself.7

Career Uncertainty

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) involves chronic, excessive, and uncontrollable worry about a range of everyday problems.1 Unlike other anxiety disorders that involve specific types of fears, such as the fear of negative evaluation in social anxiety disorder, and the fear of escalating physical symptoms in panic disorder, the fear in GAD is more difficult to pinpoint.

Intolerance of Uncertainty

To address this gap in understanding fears in generalized anxiety disorder, researchers in Quebec, Canada developed a model in the early 1990s. Developed by Michel Dugas and Robert Ladouceur, this model consists of four components.

Components of Intolerance of Uncertainty

The most important component is known as intolerance of uncertainty, and is thought of as a higher-order process that leads directly to worry through three other processes:

  1. Positive beliefs about worry. Positive beliefs about worry refers to holding the belief that worry is helpful in some way. In this context, worrying is a way for you to gain certainty.
  2. Negative problem orientation. Negative problem orientation refers to when you feel helpless to solve problems, view problems as threatening, or as barriers or obstacles, and doubt your ability to solve problems.
  3. Cognitive avoidance: Cognitive avoidance refers to the behavior of only dealing with problems when absolutely necessary.

People with GAD are thought to have higher intolerance of uncertainty than those with other anxiety disorders.2 They have a belief system in which uncertainty is viewed as stressful, unfair, upsetting, and to be avoided.


Educational Difficulties

Learning is a relatively lasting change in behavior that is the result of experience. It is the acquisition of information, knowledge, and skills. When you think of learning, it’s easy to focus on formal education that takes place during childhood and early adulthood. But learning is an ongoing process that takes place throughout life and isn’t confined to the classroom.

Learning Leads to Lasting Change

Learning means retaining the knowledge that you gained. If you see that new vocabulary word in another context, you will understand its meaning. If the toilet breaks in the future, you may need to watch the video again to refresh your memory on how to fix it, but you have some knowledge of what to do.

Learning Occurs As a Result of Experience

The learning process begins when you have a new experience, whether that is reading a new word, listening to someone explain a concept, or trying a new method for solving a problem. Once you’ve tried a technique for boiling eggs or a different route to work, you can determine whether it works for you and then use it in the future.

Learning Can Affect Attitudes, Knowledge, or Behavior

There’s far more to learning than “book learning.” Yes, you can learn new words, concepts, and facts. But you can also learn how to do things and how to feel about things.

It’s important to remember that learning can involve both beneficial and negative behaviors. Learning is a natural and ongoing part of life that takes place continually, both for better and for worse.

Sometimes learning means becoming more knowledgeable and leading a better life. In other instances, it means learning behaviors that are detrimental to health and well-being.

How Learning Works

The process of learning is not always the same. Learning can happen in a wide variety of ways. To explain how and when learning occurs, psychologists have proposed a number of different theories.

Learning Through Classical Conditioning

Learning through association is one of the most fundamental ways that people learn new things.3 Russian physiologist Ivan Pavlov discovered one method of learning during his experiments on the digestive systems of dogs. He noted that the dogs would naturally salivate at the sight of food, but that eventually the dogs also began to salivate whenever they spotted the experimenter’s white lab coat.

Later experiments involve pairing the sight of food with the sound of a bell tone. After multiple pairings, the dogs eventually began to salivate to the sound of the bell alone.

An unconditioned stimulus that naturally and automatically triggers a response is paired with an neutral stimulus. Eventually, an association forms and the previously neutral stimulus becomes known as a conditioned stimulus that then triggers a conditioned response.


Do you have some questions?

Incourage Counselling provides counselling services in Burnaby, BC. Reach out to us today and book a free consultation.